The Stages of Grief

I've had a difficult couple of days. I won't bore you with the circumstances, but let's just say I was disappointed by someone. Although disappointed doesn't really express the depth of my emotions. I have been profoundly sad. Deeply hurt. Incredibly confused.

And I don't process these emotions well. They come out in big wet sobs. I look nothing like this:

















Instead I have swollen, red, itchy eyes. My eye make-up is streaked down my cheeks. My nose is pink from all the blowing. And my lips are puffy and pouty. OK so my lips look exactly like Angie's. But you don't even notice them because of the rest of the mess going on.

The worst is crying at work. Yesterday my friend sent me an email asking how I was doing. That's all she wrote and I completely lost my composure. I couldn't even write back because I had to run to the bathroom to try to get control.

And then some of the work peeps know something is going on, but they don't know if they should ask (they shouldn't!). And others have no idea you're having the day from hell and they think you are a colossal bitch because you won't look them in the eye (I try not to anyway) and walk away from them when they are talking.

I think I'm just about done with this though. I've gone through the denial and the depression, both of which made me question my sanity and my value as a person. I quickly went through anger and have come out on the other side. I accept it for what it is. I see the intentional cruelty of the situation, but harbor no ill will toward the evil doer. I only want happiness for all.

I really do want world peace.